Posts tagged sigh
Posts tagged sigh
bio final in t-2 hours
MUST DO WELL
MUST STOP PANICKING
no sleeeeeeeeeeeep tonight
it’s not even finals yet
Remember how that physics test was cancelled the Wednesday before spring break (two weeks from tomorrow)?
Yeah that shit is tomorrow.
Help me. Please. I need to do well.
If I lose you,
I’m not quite sure who I’ll talk to.
Lately it’s just felt like I disappoint everyone, everywhere. Everyone wants something and all of it conflicts with something someone else wants and when I can’t produce that much of myself, people get angry and I get lectured about being selfish. I have never felt like a selfish person before now, but now I only feel like a selfish person. I’ve given myself away completely before and it didn’t end well for me. No one cared when I finally broke down. And that’s what it feels like now. I’m struggling to hold on to me while I also give you and you and you and you and you and you and you parts of me to hold. And there’s only so much of me.
Can someone teach me how to talk to people?
Like, network and stuff. I am so terrible at all of that.
It’s been a preeeeeeeeeeeeeetty okay day. I spent most of it working. Dare I say that physics is starting to make sense? I’m also very hungry. I made a box of rice a roni for lunch and I ate the whole thing. All by myself. Over the course of two hours. And I am still hungry. So not exactly sure what’s going on with that. But I do know that I need food. However, I cannot eat until approximately 8:45 pm. I am about to get ready to go to chem office hours, and then I’ll have course center for physics at 6:30 pm, and then I’ll have chemistry at 7:30 pm. Hurrah for mastering academics. It is also Rohit’s birthday today. We will be celebrating after Brian gets back from ECE lab because Rohit loves Brian. We have cupcakes! Idk if we have enough for everyone but there will be more tomorrow because it’s Priya’s birthday. And Entropy (campus junk food store) HAD CANDLES! Brian forgot to pick them up from Giant Eagle. So yay^-^ Now I just have to find someone with a lighter (which won’t be hard at all, it is college ha ha i am so funny) or matches. YAYYY FOR BIRTHDAAAAAAAAYS. Okay I have to go bye.
Those mistakes you make that you would give the world to make right.
You when you try to do something you really wanna do, and then you fail at it? And then you tell yourself that you’re definitely gonna get it the next time around, and you convince yourself that you will avenge your fallen pride and you WILL SUCCEED. And then the opportunity presents itself again and all of a sudden it seems terrifying and failing again just feels like it would crush your spirit and even though you really, really, really want to do it you’d really just rather not because not trying feels like it would be better than failing again.
Even though we all know that trying again is obviously the better option. Someone help me disregard my pride for a couple weeks.
Sometimes I just think about how hopeless everything feels. And then I get really depressed.